The Peevery

Open Peeves

If you have peeves of your own, send them to me: peevedmichelle at yahoo dot com. If you want me to link to your name to your blog, be sure to include the URL.

Red has a couple peeves:

Both of my hometown major league teams suck at a deafening volume right now.  Both teams started the season on fire, raised expectations, and then proceeded to dash them on the rocks of piss poor play.  And no, having a really good professional lacrosse team does not help.
 
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It would be nice if my kids ate something besides pasta, pizza, bananas, and breakfast cereal.  At least they're licking carrots as they get that other important food, ranch dressing.

Grudge!

The 'Entitlement' post below reminded me that I'm really annoyed with one of my very good friends. He got laid off last year at this time and spent 6 months installing hardware in Walgreens stores for $50 a store.

He has since been contracting for a company in a 'real' job and was asked to hire on with the company. The only problem is that the salary they offered him is so low he "can't live on that amount."

The salary they offered him was $8k more than I make. I have two degrees and a certification, and he has none. I don't wish him an unlivable wage, but this makes me very very bitter.

Entitled Much?

Sometimes when my friend starts in on one of her entitlement dramas I just want to say, "Get the fuck over it." 

Right in the Kisser

Whistling is a very private thing and should not be done on a shuttle bus to and fro your work's campuses, while you are one of two passengers and sitting directly behind the other passenger.

I call him Damian.

Are all 4-year-olds demon children?   I thought that at age four, little humans would listen to reason and not throw tantrums about how a sandwich was cut (triangle or rectangle,) but what the hell do I know?

Wake Up and Smell the...Ewwww

Dude in the Coffee Bean...We so know it was you that let out a fart while we were all waiting for our coffee. The place is tiny and the fact you made a beeline for the other side of the store does not take away the fact that you were caught. Next time, take it outside.

You're Not Very Quick, Are you?

Don't ask me if I'm cranky.  If I wasn't cranky before, asking me that question will make me cranky.  Either way, the answer is 'yes' and you should fucking know that by now.

Wanted: Dead or Alive

A reward is offered for information leading to the arrest and conviction of the person or persons who willfully and maliciously toss an empty Corn Nuts packet into Amy's tiny front garden every week.  Individuals with information may call the toll-free tip line at 1-800-YOU-SLOB. 

I Wanna Start a Fight

Not only did you give the wrong conference number for your 8:15 call, but because of your foul-up, you don't have all the right players for your meeting that started 15 minutes late. And yet, you're still attempting to hold it.

I hated you before, but now I'll fight you to the death. You have stolen my sleep/breakfast time!

Peeves of Yore: Democratic Edition

The Peevery is sometimes a dictatorship and sometimes a democracy, depending on the whims of our dictator for life Peeved Michelle.  If I had any control over it, it would be a socialist republic and I would want to make sure nobody's feelings got hurt but then it would be a lot less fun. 

Once, long ago, PM asked the Peevers what the worst thing they ever did was.  Adam posted a poll for us to vote on.  Peeved Michelle also didn't particularly care that GWB was re-elected.  Given her logic behind that statement, I can kind of agree and I recall that was the year even my father (a staunch Republican) didn't know who to vote for.  PM also held auditions and although votes were not part of the audition process, people voted anyway.  During round two, KTP had a peeve about voting on a smaller scale.

More recently, PM offered her vote to a candidate who did one little thing.  Sadly none took her up on it.  PM tried to get a new peever through democratic means, but it didn't work out.  She tried for a democratic Peevery again in 2007 after the Peeved Baby was born.  The Peeved Baby was upset that people failed to vote for a new Peever and through her laser eyes reminded us to vote!    

Hmm.  I didn't mean for this to be a Peeved Michelle laden post, but apparently there's a reason she's a dictator.  (Ok I admit I didn't use a single peeve about our most recent elections because they really aren't "Of Yore" now are they?)